When I first moved home my siblings ask me to take a personality test. If I remember correctly my sister had to take the personality test for a job interview. I do not put much stock in personality tests but all the ones I have taken have been fairly on the mark: my parachute is red, and I cannot remember the results of the other one I had to take for my BS in Health Administration, but I remember being surprised by the results.
So I took the Meyers-Briggs Type Indicator and my results were: Introverted (no suprise), Sensing (again no surprise), Thinking, Judging: a Guardian Inspector aka the Duty Fulfiller, Ms Superdependable.
When I think of something that is suppose to be "superdependable" I think of minivans, paper towel, industrial frame work, and other super boring or super absorbant things. But when I think about it a little more and a little deeper I guess superdependable is the only real word to describe me. You can depend on me to be a lot of things, some of them not good like: being stubborn, occasionally flaky, critical, and jaded. But there are good things you can depend on: I listen at any hour of the day or night, always have some sort of advice or pick me up for when you are down (whether you want it or not), I am persistant, a good story, a ride to work or to the doctor, a hug, a babysitter, a secret keeper. (Apparently I also have paitence with sick 14 year old dogs who just peed on my bed...thanks Suzie)
There were other things about the profile that I suppose are true: I see things in terms of black and white, "quiet and reserved...interested in security and peaceful living...strongly-felt internal sense of duty, which lends them lends them a serious air..." (true people often ask me what is wrong, when I am perfectly fine).
The next paragraph is particularly true about me: "ISTJs are very loyal, faithful, and dependable. They place great importance on honesty and integrity. They are 'good citizens' who can be depended on to do the right thing for their families and communities. While they generally take things very seriously, they also usually have an offbeat sense of humor and can be a lot of fun- especially at family and work related gatherings."
The things I expect of myself I generally tend to expect from others, especially my siblings. It is particularly difficult when I realize I cannot force this feeling on others. I have a difficult time saying "no" to others, even when its something I do particularly want to do or if it requires more work than I can realistically handle. Its particularly difficult to say "no" to friends or family because of my sense of obligation to them. This unfortunately leads to me being taken advantage of, not just in work but in other aspects of life. But in the the end I follow through with what I promise to do.
I like being in a position of authority and I am more often than not accountable for my actions (believe it or not Dad). I have been told I am overly critical sometimes and I need to learn to encourage and praise people more often. I do have a hard time appropriately expressing my feelings, which has gotten me into more trouble than I care to admit and I have lost out on relationships. It is difficult for me to gauge and read other people's feelings. It was a skill I was constantly trying to work on in nursing school, one that in light of recent events...read the fairy tale...I thought I had a good handle on, but I suppose not.
"ISTJs are likely to be uncomfortable expressing affection and emotion to others (I am even more gun-shy now....sigh). However, their strong sense of duty and the ability to see what needs to be done in any situation usually allows them to overcome their natural reservations, and they are usually quite supporting and caring individuals with the people that they love. Once the ISTJ realizes the emotional needs of those who are close to them, they put forth effort to meet those needs."
"They care deeply about those close to them, although they usually are not comfortable with expressing their love. The ISTJ is likely to express their affection through actions, rather than through words." Althought it's clear I am good at expressing how I feel through written word.
And now what you do not see: "Under stress, ISTJs may fall into 'catastrophe mode' where they see nothing but all of the possibilities of what could go wrong. They will berate themselves for things which they should have done differently, or duties which they failed to perform.." I generally tend to appologize a lot...at least lately I seem to be doing a lot of it. This is where a lot of people seem to think I am a negative person. I like to think I am a realist. I look at every situation from every possible angle, but more often than not I can be accused of seeing what can go wrong instead of hoping for what can go right. Hard to do when you are repeatedly let down.
I recently had a turn of events that will be written about in my fairy tale. It will explain why I am sharing this information, but I think its a good thing to examine yourself every once in awhile. And eventhough it hurts its not a bad idea to occassionally ask for another opinion. Which is what I am doing.
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