Day 72-74: Missing Support

This week has been tough...not so much educationally, but lack of support wise. I miss Jeremy. Only six weeks has gone by and I feel like its taking forever for May to get here and I am only in my third week of second semester. I feel extremely confused about all the work, or lack thereof that I have for class and I am extremely unmotivated to work out or to clean my house. I trudge along through mud and rain...or at least that is how it seems to me. Bad news piles on. I went to see my doctor who pretty much asked me what I wanted him to do about my headaches, Tricare wants to send me to San Diego for my septal surgery for some stupid reason, and there is a possibility...due to lack of state funding...my school may close. I have waited six years for the oppurtunity to go to nursing school and because the legistlators in Nevada feel a new casino is a better investment than education...I may loose my school. Where is my hubby when I need a hug or a little happy to get me through the day?

I also wanted to share my story about government healthcare. For those of you who are fans...you should try it some time...IT SUCKS!!!! So I went into my doctor on Tuesday. I have migraines, that have gotten worse since my miscarriage and since I now have chronic allergies. So I needed to go in for a re-evaluation since they put me on imitrex, I also needed a refill for my allergy meds, and my crazy pill (anxiety). It had been a stressful morning, I had a quiz in lab over material we hadn't gone over in class, and then Texas and I played "nurse" with two med students for this dog and pony show for investors. We had no idea what we were doing. Anways...I was already not happy, then the nurse took my weight...that made me even more unhappy. Then I go into see the dr. BIG FAT dude...not military. He asks me, very rudely, if I got everything worked out with my septum. I told him no and that I had no idea what was going on with my referal. Apparently Tricare, he told me, wants to send me to Balboa, CA...near San Diego...to get the surgery done. Well that was the straw that broke the camel's back. It had built up and built up...and finally KABOOOM!!!! The dr was so rude to me. He asked me why I was there, if I had seen an allergist (no I haven't and he didn't put in a referal for me to see one...eventhough I have been on allergy meds that don't really work for two years), I told him the imitrex got rid of the pain of the migraines, but none of the symptoms (nausea, light sensitivity, muscle tension), so he didn't give me anything else for my migraines or renew the imitrex, at that point I started crying, he didn't notice, he asked if the anxiety meds were working, I said no, then he looked at me and rolled his eyes and asked me very condescendingly why I was crying. I told him, I was stressed about school, Jeremy was deployed, my family is far away, I am not sleeping well, and my workouts are starting to feel feudal. Then he rolled his fat gut toward me and asked "Well what do you want me to do about it?" I was so shocked at the audacity of his question I sat there like a fish with my mouth gapping for air. He rolled his fat gut back to the computer and "Said your prescriptions are filled...goodbye." So I left the room bawling.

Now I know I should be greatful I have healthcare at all (which I am), but unlike even the crappiest of HMOs I don't have a choice where I go for care or the dr. I see for care. The government dictates that for me. They hire the cheapest Dr.'s and staff they can find and if you don't like it...tough nuggies. At least...with even the crappiest HMO you can ALWAYS take your business elsewhere. Now for those of you who are going to argue me on cost and whatnot....that is not the point of the story. The point is I didn't get the help I needed, eventhough it was already paid for, and I don't have a choice about where I go...I am stuck. Now some people say healthcare is healthcare however, if I am not being treated then why I am I paying?

Ok enough with that:

Day 72: Mondays are going to be weird days for the whole semester. Because I work in the morning...go to class for two hours...then go back to work. Its an awkward schedule. I like my maternity teacher though...she makes hilarious jokes about Vegas and giving birth...cracks me up. I can't remember if I gave her a name or not....anyways conception is always an interesting topic to discuss when you have no one to snuggle with.

Day 73: My first quiz of the semester! IVs!!! No I haven't stuck anyone yet, we just learned how to calculate drip rates and prime the lines...lab monkeys could do it. But I am happy to be doing something more advanced than giving a bed pan. Texas and I volunteered to help these med students with a scenerio. We were under the impression they just needed us to play nurse so the students could fake like its real, but no...that wasn't what we were doing. We were demonstrating a labor and delivery simulation for investors. The hilarious thing was none of us students had any clue what we were doing! The med students had never done a labor and delivery scenerio and Texas and I just started peds and maternity...we were all like deer caught in the headlights. There were two OB/GYNs from the medical school guiding us...but they were pretty much useless. My only saving grace was Texas...he knew what to do because a few months before he had gone through the l and d process with his wife. I just followed his lead and faked like I was monitoring vitals. I had no idea that we had manikins that could actually pop out babies...we do. Its really weird.

Day 74: I am really getting sick of this whole "teach yourself and others" thing. I think its just an excuse for Prof Plant to check her email and facebook page in class. I learned NOTHING, which was sad because we were tested on her lecture. I kind of let out a little snort there because she really didn't lecture. So I did awful on pop quiz...oh well its a good study guide for our exam next week. Peds lecture with Dr Turnin' was just as useless...while she is really smart and cares about what she teaches...she is really into the teach yourself and classmates thing and I really hate that. But! The highlight of the lecture was teasing the tiny Korean chick who had the presentation for the day...she posted on her facebook page that she was nervous about public speaking, so one of the other girls in class and I decided to give Korea a little giggle. I stuck my fingers up my nose and the other girl sits behind me (I am going to call her Ali since she boxes) groped herself. Korea laughed while giving her presentation!!! It was highly entertaining. Gotta make if fun somehow, plus we are going to be stuck together for the next year and half...its gonna get boring.